Phantom Poops

This quiet and overlooked problem is most likely plaguing the world and no one has talked about it. Well I'm here to change that, once again, and get it all out on the table.

I'll start this off by telling everyone of you blogginers. A "phantom poop" is the mysterious occurrence when you get that overwhelming feeling of the ever growing urgency of a trip to the mighty throne to unleash the furry. When the feeling is too much to take anymore and you finally sit down to let out the unneeded minerals you all the proper feelings that signifies everything went as planned. But, to your chagrin when you stand to take a gander at your recent triumph there is nothing to smile at, just an empty boil of yellowed water (and hopefully some TP you dirty sallies out there). This my friends is a "phantom poop", no visual trophy for your moments of intestinal battle.

Even though this is a minimal problem, to some of us, it does cause your smile/devious smirk to turn downwards. And I know that your recently sculpted waste artifact is most likely just snaked its way curiously down its inevitable path prematurely, there is still a possibility that it never in fact existed. If the latter is the case then what did you just go through? hmmmmmm there you go, the mental gears are now turning, contemplating the possibility that you sit and give birth to an anal baby without actually doing so.

So keep this in mind next time you sit down and shed a couple pounds. Then once you turn for that visual and find nothing think about what you just went through and if it was all for nothing.

Then think what else do you struggle through to come up without any rewards.

Now thats life.